WANDERED.

On the Fourth day, great lights

appeared in the heaVens.

to rule their planes and be for a sign;

the suN, the moon, and the stars.

however, this Great distance

has me sEndIng my praYers to them.

i, who was created on the sixth day,

have forgotTen the hands

that put them in their place.

living in rebEllion;

weaRing shame as an honoR.

how have i been so deceived?

i look good in A mirror

but i can’t see my oWn heart;

i coUldn’t see what was keEping us apart.

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TrIEd to fiNd MeaNing in thE ChaOs.

deciding whEther to love or Hate,

fasted enough to lose weight,

braided My hair to get it ofF my Face.

i was Lost alone.

withOut you, i am chaOs iN the Dark.

Questions that kePt me unrePEntant

filLed my minD like saNd over Sand.

where do i go at the crossroads?

How do i find SOlid grouNd

when i’ve stepped into decadence?

A haZe on the horizon.

i can’t see my own

reflect!on in still waters.

Walking around with tired Eyes

That still Wanders.

I AM AT MY LOWESt of lows;

Without you, i am merely a living soul.

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Fell into sIn fasTer than

i would reCite 10 hail Marys.

my conscience telLing me to turn back.

Leave my Knees on the flOor;

Let them Hurt A little more.

If my works atone for me a Year,

Maybe you can recoGnize my faith

When I stand at youR gate.

But there’s noThing

I can hide from you.

My blooded fEEt reveals

The path I’ve walked.

My breath smells

Of the rubbish I chopped

And my hands, of the idols I touched.

Pride took me there;

Your goodNess brought me Here.

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The adoration of this world

Is unKind and cruel.

It pleases my flEsh

But kills me beFore I become.

Here I am, at the feat

That chaSEd after my wandering.

Here is my body

wHich I present as an offering;

You will treat it better than I did.

Imagined different ways

You would fail me.

I’m still left wondering.

“Newborn in this old world,

Let me dry your tears

and give you a hand

for every step you take.

Even when you don’t feel like walking,

Don’t think I have left you to wander.

I will always remain by your side.”

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Father, it is not good

That I walk this earth alone.

Ever since I wandered from Eden

I have not found rest since then.

Try as I may to fight

with all my might,

There were more hands

than I could catch.

Your hands lifted me to a place

Where surrender flows with grace.

Passengers to the wind;

We freefall to the highest

Depths of your heart.